This book “The Sexually Confident Wife”, by Shannon Ethridge, is highly recommended for women. With both warmth and extreme candor this book teaches women how to find victory over the issues that are holding them back in the bedroom. And embrace intimacy with their husbands with a renewed mind, renewed passion and joy. Some readers will be surprised by the no-holds-barred information in this book.
The author chose to be bold and blunt and not candy coat anything just so women can stay in their comfort zones. But rather it’s about bringing you out, and breaking the cycle of wrong thinking. It explains that women from all walks of life have been given such negative messages about their sexuality. As a result they have been robbed of their sexual confidence by shame from past sexual abuse, guilt over past sexual behaviors, or fear of intimacy. On the other hand, you may be a sexually confident wife, and if that’s the case, great, but a refresher course never hurt anybody.
God is the creator of sex, and has given us sexuality as a gift. However many women struggle in this area. 1Corinthians 7:1-40, “Each man should have his own wife and each woman shall have her own husband. The husband shall give to his wife her congical rights, and likewise the wife to her husband, for the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. Likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Do not deprive one another! Except perhaps by agreement for a limited time that you may come together in prayer,but then come together again, so that Satan may not temp you because of lack of self control.” Genesis 2:25, “The man and his wife were both naked and not ashamed!”
Maximize the sexual and emotional potential in your marriage. A woman’s innermost need is for an emotional and spiritual bond with another human being, trying to achieve one without the other doesn’t work. I want to help you overcome the “Church lady” syndrome and become more liberated in the bedroom.
The “Church lady syndrome” is what happens to a woman who grows up with the mentality that sex is bad and God doesn’t approve. She feels as if she can’t have both God and sex , she must choose. Married women sometime falsely assume that if they freely engage in sex with their husbands, it will make them “bad girls”. But nothing could be further from the truth. For most women 30, 40, 50, and beyond sex was certainly not discussed in church, it was a secret. For the young woman of today that’s 20 yrs old sex is still not discussed in church to any degree. If Christians don’t have the right to talk about sex then who does? However, living in the information age, information on Christian women and sex can be accessed easily.
Unless you’ve taken a vow of celibacy as a nun, your faith does not require you to abandon your sexual pleasure with your husband. It’s not about having a great body, or obsessing over getting one, as long as your are healthy, its not about fitting the “young, hot stereotypical mold”, or about being a sexual doormat, or killing your conscious in order to do anything and everything to please someone else.
The sexually confident wife strives to keep the physical mental and emotional components in her relationship in balance. She learns to love her body and feel beautiful in her own skin. She does not compare herself or her husband with anyone else. She knows her husband finds her desirable and she ‘s confident about what she has to offer him. Their spirits are connected and content. Consider fully integrating your spirituality and your sexually. Once you bring these two aspects of your being together, they become inseparable, vital to your fulfillment and incredibly satisfying.
How To become a sexually Confident Wife
The true purpose of sexuality other than procreation is to create a powerful bond between husband and wife with their deepest passions that satisfies their souls.
- Strip down Bare in front of a full length mirror and face yourself. This is about self acceptance. Examine yourself. The positives, your perceived flaws. If you are unhappy with something, change it! Don’t obsess over it. It’s important to point out for Christian women, it’s okay to make yourselves beautiful, and sexy, and be confident.
2. Celebrate your femininity, embrace it. Buy lingerie or bra and panties that you feel sexy in. Nobody feels sexy in big old white cotton granny panties. So get out there and buy yourself something nice.
3. Openly communicate what you find pleasurable. An open dialogue will help you express what has been suppressed.
4. Shave. Shaving your private areas may seem like a big change from just going natural. However the 1970’s bush is not in. You will feel 10 times more confident if you would trim. If your not confident to do it yourself, have it done professionally. Get waxed.
5. Do not compare yourself to porn stars and models. This is a real killer for many woman. They seemed so skinny, so tanned, and so perfect, but the devil is a liar. They are ordinary every day women that have 10 people working on them before they step in front of a camera. Easy to look good when you have a glam squad. You are you and you’re beautiful, embrace it, take what you got and do the best can with. Play the hand your dealt.
6. Relax and and be in the moment – Don’t be so hard on yourself. Sex is suppose to be fun!