“Taken- in-hand” is a neologism that refers to a style of monogamous, heterosexual relationship which is male led. The female submits to her male partner’s decisions in matters of everyday life.
Non Sexual Dynamics
Most taken-in-hand relationships exist between couples who are married or at least highly committed. The root of the idea is for the female to submit to the male in everyday life. To what extent and which areas this covers varies from couple to couple. From a general avoidance of conflict by letting the male partner, “get his way”, to almost complete submission to the preferences of the man in matters such as clothing, friendships, styling of hair and many other things.
It is quite common in “taken-in-hand” relationships for the woman to generally curtail her social life significantly so as to devote more time to her relationship. Unlike the “BDSM” relationships, the secular Dominant ,sub, relationship “taken-in- hand” relationships are “Real-Life” rather than consisting of negotiated scenes. Unlike a BDSM relationship where most activities take place in the bedroom, or the scene, (parties, clubs,). “Taken-in-hand” relationships place a great deal of emphasis on everyday “vanilla” submission to the authority as male head of household in a marriage or committed relationship.
The male partner is expected to be the final decision maker in most matters and the female partner is expected to submit to him. This is generally intended for the ultimate benefit of the relationship, reducing conflict and fostering closeness and trust. This could be and is often regarded by many as a very old-fashioned marriage. It takes a really strong man to head up a “taken-in-hand” relationship. Maturity and strength are paramount traits in men who are in this type of relationship.
A great deal of responsibility is placed on a man to treat his woman with care and strength. This is not for the amateur or immature man. He has to be a seasoned gentlemen. I for one love a strong take charge man! Love it! And I know there are many women out there such as myself. I like a man who is decisive, thoughtful, makes careful moves and always has his woman’s best interest at heart. I think one problem is that women have grown so independent that it’s impossible for you to meet this type of man because you won’t get out of your own way. Because if you ever get ahold of a “Real Man” ladies, you won’t want anything less.
I thank God this is the type of man I have. I’m a strong woman and I need that. When a real man is content and happy there’s nothing he won’t do for you. A real man will move heaven and earth for his woman! Many conventional marriages do fit unknowingly into the “Taken-in-hand” dynamic. Husband’s have a saying, “Happy Wife, Happy Life”.
But there’s also another saying, “Happy Husband, Happy Life”. In order to achieve this he’s going to have to have his way too. I like to see my husband happy. I don’t want or like to see him disappointed. This is what a real man does, whatever it takes to make his woman happy. And a man with that type of posture for his woman deserves the type of woman who will let him take her in-hand.
6 Traits of a Healthy Submissive
- The Healthy Submissive. The healthy submissive is capable of intense joy especially in the context of a sustaining relationship.
- The healthy submissive finds significant relaxation when properly related. She is at ease in that place.
- The healthy submissive has finely tuned interpersonal sensitivity. She is reactive to subtle shifts in the emotional tone of others.
- The healthy submissive is a giver. She often needs help to ration herself because her impulses lead her always to do good for others.
- The healthy Submissive has a hunger to be the object of an intense and penetrating understanding. When her nature is understood and she is held in a loving and firm frame, her devotion is almost limitless.
- The healthy submissive has an enormous capacity for devotion from which springs her service.
Verse of the Day: Colossians 3:18, “Wives, submit to your own husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.”