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Verse of the day:

Fall Style 2017

It’s that time of year again where the mornings are crisp and the nights a little cooler.  Time to step out in style for the fall 2017 season!

 

  • Classic Black and white never goes out of style.

  • The Color red is red-hot for the fall season

  • Casual shades of Grey

 

  • Build your wardrobe one piece at a time with neutral colors that can be worn with various pieces

  • Nice high boot and chic bag are always on trend for fall.  The long suede boot is a must have for fashionistas

 

  • From office to evening casual


SCW sends its heartfelt condolences and prayers of healing to all of the victims of the senseless and evil Las Vegas shooting.  Thank you first responders for your swift, professional response and bravery.  May our God comfort all those affected. 

Verse of the day:

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How to get and keep the Christian man you want through Building Intimacy

What is Intimacy?  Intimacy generally refers to the feeling of being in a close personal association or belonging together.  It is a familiar and very close affective connection with another as a result of a bond  that is formed through knowledge and experience of the other.  Genuine intimacy in human relationships requires dialogue, transparency, vulnerability and reciprocity.  Immediately when people hear the word intimate they think of sex.  However, we are going to elevate our minds and discuss a higher level of Intimacy.

Intimacy can be achieved and maintained in a relationship “without” sex!  The highest level of intimacy is connecting with another mentally and spiritually without sex.  Problem is most people never get that far to experience it because they ruined it by jumping in the bed too soon! I have discussed in earlier post that my husband and I “waited ” before we got married. It was the best thing!Being in the will of God is always best. I was at a place in my life where I really wanted to things right! As a strong Christian man being the leader that my husband is,he said early on in the relationship ‘ look, this is what we’re going to do” . That’s ultimately how I knew he was the one! because he was willing to wait for me. He showed me he was different from the other guys.

He said that I was different from any other woman he had met. My husband said I’m not looking to “rent” I’m looking to buy! Can I get AMEN!   An intimate relationship is an interpersonal relationship that involves emotional and or physical intimacy.  Physical intimacy is characterized by platonic love, friendship, romantic love, or sexual activity.  Emotional intimacy develops after a certain level of trust has been reached, and personal bonds established.  Intimate conversations become the basis for “confidences” (secret knowledge), that bind people together.

But first we must start at the beginning, “To thou own self be true”.  You must have an intimate relationship with God.  You must know who you are.  You must know who’s you are.  Choose thee this day whom you serve.  You cannot serve two masters.  Seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things shall be added.  Do the hard work on yourself to be ready to receive what God has for you.  Pray “Search me oh God and know my heart” Psalms 149:23.  That means search my soul, fix what needs fixing, correct in me what needs correcting.  So relationship with God, good relationship with self, and then a good relationship with another.  You’ve got to be different than the other girls, it’s your “difference” that makes you special, makes you a “Wife”.

But in order to get the good Christian man God has for you, you’ve got to get rid of the old.  God won’t put new wine in old wine skins.  He is doing a new thing but you won’t be able to recognize the new thing if you’re stuck.  Stuck in that old mentality that old way of thinking.  To get what you’ve never had you have to do something you’ve never done.  I had such a big problem with establishing intimacy before God touched my life.  I had a problem with trusting people so as a result I didn’t let anyone in.  I had to learn what it takes to achieve true intimacy and I did.  Keep in mind it can only be achieved with a like minded individual and since this is next level thinking it’s going to take a special person, but it’s worth it.

So when people can walk away from you, “Let Them Walk!”  Don’t try to talk another into staying with you, loving you, “Let them Walk”.  Because destiny is never tied to anyone who has left!  The right person will stay.  I want you to always remember that and this is not relegated to “just relationships”.  You don’t need everyone liking you just the right person!  Proverbs 21:1 “The king’s heart is in the hands of the Lord and as the rivers of water He turneth whatsoever He will.”

 

 

5 Ways to Build and Maintain Intimacy

“As a man thinketh so is he” Proverbs 3:27.  You must be, believe, think, and carry yourself as a high value woman.  Challenge yourself, challenge him!!!  Commit to never again, sleep with a man again unless and until he marries you.  Living in the times we do this idea is not popular.  The media is saturated with sex and debauchery and it’s only going to get worse.  The world will get crazier and crazier the Bible says so.  But you as a Christian woman must hold fast to your faith.  God blesses good decisions!!!  Could it be that you should stop giving all the wrong men time and attention, and clear the way for the right man that God has for you.
The law of attraction says whatever you’re seeking is seeking you. That good Christian man is looking for you too.  He’s looking for a good Christian woman to make her his wife.  The Bible says “He that findeth a wife findeth a good thing!” ( Amen).  That means she’s wife material when he finds her.  This man will respect that you have standards!  You will challenge him and cause him to step up to the plate.  If there is no challenge there will be no interest!!!  Or short term interest at best.  Boy meets girl, girl sleeps with boy, GAME OVER.  Men like challenge!!  They actually thrive on it!!  And it builds him and makes him more of a man.  Look at their recreational activities: Sports, video games, computers.  Those things provide challenge, they love games.  There’s no challenge in you handing over the goods.  When you say NO it’s game on now.  Make him work for it.  This is what tells him you’re the one.

Concentrate on getting to know this person – the goal when you meet someone new is to try and get to know them as best you can. And try to decide is this someone you would like to spend time with further?  When we meet someone new we start a connection!  Keep that going!  Let the relationship grow or not grow out of connection.  When you have sex you break the connection.  He’s ready to go on to the next conquest.  You must break that cycle or you’re doomed to repeat it.

Don’t be too needy – Men have a nose for that kind of thing.  A woman who’s doing her own thing and has her own life is very attractive to a man.  I heard a handsome celebrity man say in an interview that he saw two attractive women in the airport.  The first one he said, “she was trying too hard”.  Maybe she was winking at him, smiling too hard, I don’t know but he wasn’t feeling it even though he thought she was pretty.  The second one he said was the one who drew him in because she wasn’t even looking at him, she was doing her own thing.  He was checking her out.  Play it cool and let him come to you!!  Let HIM be the man in every aspect, let him make the advances, let him pick you up, let him pay for dates .

Stop letting men move in with you – I learned from a pastor to Never commit to, or marry a man based on his potential.  For example: “one day he’s going to be a great business man”.  A man doesn’t have to be a rich man to be a good man that’s not what I’m saying.  As a man he should be stable!  Stable meaning, he should be working, have his own place and car.  Until a man establishes himself first he is unable to give of himself to a woman.  He has to establish who he is and what he does.  Living together a man gets all the benefits of marriage and none of the responsibility!!  That’s not a smart move for the woman.

Build Intimacy through: Honesty, transparency, communication, conversation, closeness, establishing a friendship.  You build true intimacy by not having sex.  Instead building a connection that will last a lifetime.  Stop robbing your tomorrow for short term gratification, which is essentially lust not love, there’s a big difference.  That’s what I want for every Christian woman out there, to experience true love.  Someone who accepts you for who you are and loves you anyway.

  1. Develop Intimacy – By getting to know him without sex.  If he can’t accept that, he’s not the one!  Show him your difference.  It won’t take very long for people to show you who they really are.  You decide whether it’s worth going any further or if it’s not a good fit and move on with your dignity intact.  A man is never going to bond with you emotionally through having sex with him.  For him sex is just physical, until a woman captures him emotionally or until he puts a ring on it.  There are women who’ve been in long term relationships for years but he hasn’t proposed because you allow him to be comfortable as things are.  A man is only going to do what you let him get away with.
  2. Build Intimacy – Establishing trust and closeness without sex.  Nurture the connection.  Most importantly, wait! wait! before you just give yourself away to a man.  Waiting is a war tactic.  Whoever can hold out the longest wins!  Ladies certainly know how to hold out, you just have to do it at the right time!  Which is in the beginning when you meet him.  Set your boundaries, show him your standards, there’s no game playing.  Be upfront, don’t lead him on.  When you make your stand up front people will either fall in line or fall out.  And praise God when they leave, they did you favor, you don’t want him. And that puts you a little closer to getting the man God has for you.  You don’t have to waste time with mediocrity.  Sexually undisciplined men are babies.  You need a man.
  3. Maintain intimacy – When God answers your prayers for marriage and gives you what you dreamed of, it’s not over!  It’s just beginning, and now you have to maintain what he gave you. Vow to always be honest with one another.

Featured Married Couple: Actress Meagan Goode and husband.  Universal Studio executive, and pastor Devon Franklin.  They are our featured couple of the month because they have lived it and experienced true intimacy by NOT having sex before marriage.  They’re both Christians and were just both at a place in their lives where they did not want to have sex again until they were married.  Now they have a healthy happy relationship that God has blessed and formed a lasting bond.  I’m so happy for them!  I like that they’ve been so open about waiting for sex and their journey.  It shows other women what God can do if you will do it his way!  They also wrote a book called, “The Wait”.  I was very inspired by their decision to write the book.  Though I have not yet read it, I plan to but it has inspired me to write another book with my husband as well.  So we have that to look forward to!  Good luck Meagan and Devon to God be the glory!

 

 

Verse of the day:

Author’s Note:

Hope you guys are having an awesome summer! I am too!  Getting a lot done.  It’s possible to be blessed and still have challenges.  Take heart that God is strengthening us in those difficult times, and we must press on!  To God be the Glory Forever!  You have a friend in California!

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Summer Wedding Guide 2017

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Planning your one of a kind wedding of a lifetime takes careful consideration to every detail. Understanding wedding costs now can help you with your wedding budget later.  The average cost of a wedding in the United States is 26,000. The planning of a wedding is a collection of decisions.  The decisions you will make will weigh heavily on the cost and outcome of your wedding so choose wisely.  For instance you’ll need to decide If you will be planning your wedding or if you would like to hire a professional wedding planner.  There are a number of options to make your day special on a smaller budget and we will explore those options later in the post. Let’s begin with the basics.

If your planning your first wedding and wondering where does that money go? Let’s see

  • The dress  Of course included in the bride’s budget will be hair and makeup spa, salon, lingerie and shopping. According to bridal association of America the average cost of a wedding dress is $1,500.  On the high end expect $2,000 – $5,000

Tuxedo –  The popular option for men is to rent the tuxedo. Depending on the type, a tux can $300 – $800

  • Wedding Bands – The rings are a little big thing since rings are a  huge part of your budget.  Again depending on the type ring budgets for both can be upwards of $10,000.

  • The wedding party – Although they are technically counted within the number of guests.  The wedding party is a separate deal in my opinion.  That’s because their needs need to be addressed first.  Because depending on the number of groomsmen and bridesmaids, they’ll all have to be fitted and sized for their wardrobe.  A good part of your budget will be spent on the “wedding party” alone.

BridesmaidsIn the mid range bridesmaids dresses cost about $100 – $250 each depending on detail of the dress.

Groomsmen – Traditionally groomsmen will rent.  Tux rental can go from $300 – $800 for mid range or $1,500 for certain brands.

  • Photographer – It’s all about the pictures!  A mid range package cost between $1,200 – $2,800.  Upscale packages starting at $5,000.  Typically budgeting $1,500 for a nice photo package and photographer will work.

  • Videographer – Memories that last a lifetime – the average costs of a videographer ranges from $1,400 – $1,900.  An in-demand videographer may charge upwards of $7,000.  Typically you should budget $1,500 to $2,000.

  • The number of guests – Will it be a small number of guests say, ten?  Or three hundred in attendance? Keep in mind the number of guests will impact the size of the venue for the wedding and reception.  You want to make sure you know how many people the location can accommodate.

  • Flowers  These are one of those things that seem like a small thing but it’s actually an expensive thing. Wedding flowers are expensive.  Decide what you would like your floral arrangement to look like.  $1,000 to $3,000 for the bride, bridesmaids, and wedding location and reception.

  • Where  would you like to have your ceremony?  A good old fashion church wedding?  An outdoor ceremony at a Garden of some sort?  Or the beach?

  • Church There will usually be a fee associated with the church.

  • Outdoor Garden – Garden weddings, privately owned land. can start at $500 – $2,500. Depending on what’s included for instance chair and table rentals.

  • The Beach – even on the beach you will have the cost of the minister, catering and set up can run, $2,000 – $4,000

  •  Some couples opt to have wedding and reception at the same place.  Such as a “winery”.  A wedding and reception at a winery is an elegant option.  The lush grounds, make an awesome backdrop for your wedding.  The best part is after the ceremony the guests can just walk over to a beautifully decorated dining room for the reception.  Not to mention the variety of wines for all the wine buffs on your list which adds a little something extra to the evening, say $6,000 wedding and reception.

  • Reception – Average cost of a wedding reception is between $12,000 – $15,000.  Brides magazine reports that 50% of a couples budget is spent on the reception.

  • Daytime

  • Evening

  • The Cake – one of those items that seems like a little thing but remember little things add up.  $600 – $3,000.  Each tier on a wedding cake adds to the total cost in addition to cake decorations

  • Limousine transportation for the Wedding party – Prices can vary on limousines but rentals start at $200 – $400 for 3 hours each depending on how many cars you need.

Entertainment at reception – Most couples opt for a DJ, or you might want to have a band

Happily ever after

  • Honeymoon- Although separate from the cost of the wedding. In addition is your honeymoon. Some couples view a honeymoon as optional, with the idea in mind that we’ll take a honeymoon later. I’m  NOT one of those people. You should absolutely celebrate the start of your new life together in style and have a ball for at least a week.In fact I suggest making the honeymoon one of your big ticket items in other words do not skimp on this event.

 

8 Ways  to cut the cost of your wedding without looking cheap

  1. The biggest and first thing to do to cut down the cost of your wedding,  Is to cut the number of guests.  Size matters.
  2. Think outside the box!  You don’t have to do things traditionally.  Do what works for you and your budget.  For instance, time of day matters, a buffet lunch is less expensive than evening dinner complete with appetizers and three course meal with desert and champagne.  Also most venue charge more  for night dinners.
  3. Be flexible – Compare your options via the internet.  Before deciding on any purchase.  You may find something better online.
  4. Wedding flowers can run into the thousands.  Stick with flowers that are in season.
  5. Step out for the reception – You don’t have to spend a bundle on a reception hall – opt for beautiful garden receptions or reception at the beach.  Summer receptions outdoors rock!
  6. Keep the food casual – Who says you have to serve surf and turf – Go with tasty filler foods, sliders appetizers, baked potatoes, fresh salads, shrimp cocktail is a favorite and not too terribly expensive.
  7. DIY – Planning the wedding yourself instead of a planner can significantly bring down cost.
  8.  Focus on what’s important – Focus on the “day” Bonding your union, and not on the things you’ll have around you. Because at the end of the day it’s the love you share that’s important not the temporal things that really don’t matter.  The flowers will die the guests will go home, however you and he will remain.  Thank God for each other and pray over your marriage.  Have fun!

A Holy Sacrament, The two shall become one.

God Bless Lilian and Joseph Meyers my great grandparents whose descendants will celebrate their family reunion today.

Author’s note: May God Bless my family today.  The Family Reunion of  the Meyers & Lashley families today, June 8, 2017.   1 Corinthians 13:8,  “Love never fails!” Enjoy your day everyone!

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Summer Date Night Ideas 2017

Looking for the perfect way to spend time with  a special someone this summer?  It’s really about  the company not about what you do.  Sometimes the simple things are best and the most fun.  With plenty of sunshine, longer days and warmer temps lend itself to outdoor activities and more sociability.  Make the most of summer by getting out and having fun!

7 Fun inexpensive Summer Date Night Ideas!

Wine tasting double date night

A walk on the beach

Amusement Park

Picnic in the park

Go for a Swim! It’s summer!

Take a stroll to a neighborhood restaurant that has outdoor seating

Find a spot to watch the sunset

Verse of the day:

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Stylish Summer 2017

The 2017 summer season is so exciting!  From fit to flare, to casual wear, to evening, daytime, beautiful dresses & skirts perfect for the stylishly feminine modest woman.  The best looks, trends, and shopping picks for summer style.

What’s trending?

  • Cotton Summer casual

  • Denim

  • Denim Mini

  • Florals

  •  Sunday Best

  • Date Night

  • Evening Cocktail dress

 

  • Summer getaway dress

Bags & heels

Color trend 2017 Canary Yellow

Verse of the day:

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God’s women Rock Classy

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Spring Trends 2017

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SCW’s spring and summer preview has it all for you!  Color trends, from professional wear to casual wear, makeup and hair.  Spring is almost here!  And it’s never looked so good!  This seasons fashions are bold, feminine, and fun.  Runaways have been buzzing with excitement from New York to Milan.

 

  • Professional wear

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Casual Dressy

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Chloe, Fashion Show, Ready to Wear Collection Spring Summer 2017 in Paris

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Makeup

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Casual

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Date Night Casual Spring in slimming basic black

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Summer Preview

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Hair 2017

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Elopement Dress

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Simplistic satin glamour

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Mermaid High drama dress

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Verse of the day:

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Valentines Day Special Weekend Edition

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Hello Ladies! For a romantic and memorable Valentine’s Day 2017, Love is in the air! Although you can’t put a price on love it’s important to be mindful of your budget. So whether you’re trying to splurge, or keep it moderate, there’s a gift out there your special someone will love. I think the key with Valentine’s day gifts are to put a lot of thought into it. Certainly a woman is impressed when she knows her man put a lot of thought and effort in planning something special for her.

For example: My husband and I had discussed our Valentine’s day date night plans ahead of time. So I was looking forward to that. But then he threw me a curve ball and said I’m getting my gift tonight, be dressed and ready!  So I was like wow I didn’t know he had anything else planned, he surprised me! And I love that, now I can’t wait to see what it is.  I also have some secrets of my own for him so it should prove to be a very interesting Valentine’s day to say the least. For men, I think the key with VDay gifts is to not only be thoughtful but to give him a gift that is useful! And there are some really nice couples gifts that are fun and romantic!

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  • Couples

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Verse of the day:

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Must have New Year’s eve Date Night Dresses

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This New year’s eve you want to sparkle, shimmer and shine! For the biggest party of the year and the biggest date night, you want to look your best! This season it’s all about textures!  Metallics and sequins are trending.  Black is a popular color for New Years eve dresses, however you can mix it up and stand out with color.  From long gowns to cocktail dresses this is your most exciting dress of the year.

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What to Wear to New Year's Eve 2015/2016 Parties- Last Minute NYE Party Dresses Jumpsuits - OSoChic.com

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  •  Ideally you want to wear a dress on New Year’s eve, depending on the venue or event  it’s ok to opt for pants on New Year’s eve, be sure to make it dressy.

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Verse of the day:

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Winter Safety and Holiday Travel Tips

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Celebrating the beauty of winter!  The frigid temperatures can wreak havoc on your skin. These simple winter skin care tips will show you how to protect your skin, while you enjoy the season.

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Protect your skin from the cold weather. Bundle up. Cover your head, neck, and hands.

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Stay Hydrated.  Just because the heat is gone doesn’t mean your body needs less water.  If you often have chapped lips, and dry skin all over your body during the winter months, this likely due to dehydration. The skin dries out during winter.  Replenish your skin with adequate amounts of water. (recommended 8 glasses per day) however, just do the best you can.

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Moisturize your skin.  Apply an allover body moisturizer daily after bathing.

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Beat the Winter Blues by socializing.  The winter blues formerly known as SAD “Seasonal Affective Disorder”.  It’s a medically recognized form of depression that occurs when the weather grows colder and days get shorter.  While there’s no way to control the weather you can decrease the feeling of depression.  Socialize regularly.  Get outdoors with your kids in the sun, plan outdoor activities.

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Take vitamins.  Winter is the time for getting colds and spreading viruses, with people remaining indoors most of the time. due to the cold weather make sure your immune system as what it needs to fight off germs and keep you healthy.

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Travel Holiday tips

  • When traveling by plane for the holidays always leave at least 2 hours early for the airport. During heavier travel times there is road traffic and delays to consider as well as the airport traffic itself.  For your sanity do yourself a favor and leave earlier.
  • Pack as light as you can for your holiday travel.  For women I know this is a stretch.  With airport security getting stricter on baggage limits and weight allowances costing you extra time and money, it’s just more advantageous to pack lighter and avoid the hassle.  1 carry on, 1 checked bag. I once had to pay $80 dollars in overweight baggage fees.
  • If traveling by car.  Always have your car serviced before long road trips.  In addition you should have a car emergency kit in your car for your family.

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          Car emergency kit

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Verse of the day:

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Christmas Holiday Entertaining

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How do you make holiday entertaining less stressful?

It’s a frenzied season with many expectations and obligations. Presents have to be purchased, baking has to be done, guests are coming, relatives have to be visited. In a season where you should experience peace  and joy you could miss it all in the midst of the excitement. Here are some tips to manage stress this Christmas season while enjoying time with families and friends.

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5 Tips for making Christmas Holiday Entertaining Less Stressful

 

  • At least one week prior to your event, make a list. Plan the menu, decide what errands you need to run and establish your guest list and send out invitations.  (formal invites need to be sent beginning of December). Even if you’re not a planner and don’t love lists like I do. Planning every detail eliminates stress and takes the last-minute decision-making and guest work out of the day.

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  • Set your table in advance. As far in advance as possible. Decide if it will be buffet style or serving style. For small dinner parties serving is fine. But if it’s a large number of people buffet is the way to go. In a formally set table stack your dishes to give it an elegant flair.

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  • Good music is essential to a great part and adds atmosphere. Put together a festive playlist with favorites and classic for your guests.

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  • A simple way to give your holiday decorations a professional look is to stick to a color scheme two or three colors max.

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  • Have a children’s table if there are going to be children there.  So children will be kept entertained, while guests socialize and mingle.

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Verse of the day:

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Winter Fashionistas 2016

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Looking good while dressing warm that’s the ticket. Your first line of defense in cold weather is a stylish yet warm coat. From wool to fleece the three quarter coat is what’s on trend this season. A stylish coat, great boots, warm sweater skinny pant, or jeans grab your stylish bag and head out to brave the colder temperatures while looking hot!

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  • Coats

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  • Casual

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  • Office

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  • Top 5 retail gift cards of 2016 for fashion

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  • For Him

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Verse of the day:

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Holiday Decorating on a Budget

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Decorating your home for the Christmas holiday and creating a warm and inviting atmosphere  doesn’t have to blow the budget.  You just have to shop smart. Save money on all your Christmas decorations with these money-saving tips.

  • The best time to buy Christmas decorations and save big is December 26th. That’s right take advantage of day after Christmas sales. You’ll have a jump on next year.
  • Always compare shop. The internet has made it even easier with websites that will compare shop for you. Type in the product and it will give you at least 3 to 4 competitors prices. Make sure to get the best price on your items.
  • Shopping late is smart.  The closer it gets to Christmas the better the sales are going to be. For instance the last week leading up to the big day will have the best deals 50-75% off.

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  • You can do a lot with candy canes, candles, ball ornaments, and candy.

  • Decorating your mantle with garland, stockings and candles

  • Dress your well appointed holiday table with candles and pine cones.

  • Do use festive glassware and nice flat ware

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  • Dress up your banister with garland

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  • You may not have tons of money for decorations, however dressing up the outside of your house will creative a fun festive air for your guest. When they arrive they’ll know they’re in for a great party. You can often find sales on fresh garland at stores like Lowe’s or Home Depot which also have tree lots.

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  • Decorate the outside with lights

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Smart Tip of the day: Be creative and shop around for the best deals!

Verse of the day

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10 Outfit Ideas for your 2016 Winter Date Night

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It’s cold!  But you still want to look hot for your date.  Below freezing temperatures dictate wearing layers to insulate warmth.  It’s cozy sweater weather!  And you can be stylishly warm.  Millennials like to be casually stylish.  Whatever your plans for date night you’ll be ready with SCW’s  winter date night outfit picks.

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  • The great thing about winter date night is you can pair a great sweater with a pair of leggings and boots and whola’  grab your stylish bag and go.

  • Leather.  Very hip and stylish (skirt or pants) can also be paired with a sweater and boots.

  • Dark Denim for winter clean and classic.  Can also be paired with sweater and boots.

  • A great pair of leather or suede long boots (heel or flat)

 

10 Stylish warm Date Night Looks

 

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          Chicago

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          New York City

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         California

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Verse of the day:

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