Verse of the day:
What is Intimacy? Intimacy generally refers to the feeling of being in a close personal association or belonging together. It is a familiar and very close affective connection with another as a result of a bond that is formed through knowledge and experience of the other. Genuine intimacy in human relationships requires dialogue, transparency, vulnerability and reciprocity. Immediately when people hear the word intimate they think of sex. However, we are going to elevate our minds and discuss a higher level of Intimacy.
Intimacy can be achieved and maintained in a relationship “without” sex! The highest level of intimacy is connecting with another mentally and spiritually without sex. Problem is most people never get that far to experience it because they ruined it by jumping in the bed too soon! I have discussed in earlier post that my husband and I “waited ” before we got married. It was the best thing!Being in the will of God is always best. I was at a place in my life where I really wanted to things right! As a strong Christian man being the leader that my husband is,he said early on in the relationship ‘ look, this is what we’re going to do” . That’s ultimately how I knew he was the one! because he was willing to wait for me. He showed me he was different from the other guys.
He said that I was different from any other woman he had met. My husband said I’m not looking to “rent” I’m looking to buy! Can I get AMEN! An intimate relationship is an interpersonal relationship that involves emotional and or physical intimacy. Physical intimacy is characterized by platonic love, friendship, romantic love, or sexual activity. Emotional intimacy develops after a certain level of trust has been reached, and personal bonds established. Intimate conversations become the basis for “confidences” (secret knowledge), that bind people together.
But first we must start at the beginning, “To thou own self be true”. You must have an intimate relationship with God. You must know who you are. You must know who’s you are. Choose thee this day whom you serve. You cannot serve two masters. Seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things shall be added. Do the hard work on yourself to be ready to receive what God has for you. Pray “Search me oh God and know my heart” Psalms 149:23. That means search my soul, fix what needs fixing, correct in me what needs correcting. So relationship with God, good relationship with self, and then a good relationship with another. You’ve got to be different than the other girls, it’s your “difference” that makes you special, makes you a “Wife”.
But in order to get the good Christian man God has for you, you’ve got to get rid of the old. God won’t put new wine in old wine skins. He is doing a new thing but you won’t be able to recognize the new thing if you’re stuck. Stuck in that old mentality that old way of thinking. To get what you’ve never had you have to do something you’ve never done. I had such a big problem with establishing intimacy before God touched my life. I had a problem with trusting people so as a result I didn’t let anyone in. I had to learn what it takes to achieve true intimacy and I did. Keep in mind it can only be achieved with a like minded individual and since this is next level thinking it’s going to take a special person, but it’s worth it.
So when people can walk away from you, “Let Them Walk!” Don’t try to talk another into staying with you, loving you, “Let them Walk”. Because destiny is never tied to anyone who has left! The right person will stay. I want you to always remember that and this is not relegated to “just relationships”. You don’t need everyone liking you just the right person! Proverbs 21:1 “The king’s heart is in the hands of the Lord and as the rivers of water He turneth whatsoever He will.”
“As a man thinketh so is he” Proverbs 3:27. You must be, believe, think, and carry yourself as a high value woman. Challenge yourself, challenge him!!! Commit to never again, sleep with a man again unless and until he marries you. Living in the times we do this idea is not popular. The media is saturated with sex and debauchery and it’s only going to get worse. The world will get crazier and crazier the Bible says so. But you as a Christian woman must hold fast to your faith. God blesses good decisions!!! Could it be that you should stop giving all the wrong men time and attention, and clear the way for the right man that God has for you.
The law of attraction says whatever you’re seeking is seeking you. That good Christian man is looking for you too. He’s looking for a good Christian woman to make her his wife. The Bible says “He that findeth a wife findeth a good thing!” ( Amen). That means she’s wife material when he finds her. This man will respect that you have standards! You will challenge him and cause him to step up to the plate. If there is no challenge there will be no interest!!! Or short term interest at best. Boy meets girl, girl sleeps with boy, GAME OVER. Men like challenge!! They actually thrive on it!! And it builds him and makes him more of a man. Look at their recreational activities: Sports, video games, computers. Those things provide challenge, they love games. There’s no challenge in you handing over the goods. When you say NO it’s game on now. Make him work for it. This is what tells him you’re the one.
Concentrate on getting to know this person – the goal when you meet someone new is to try and get to know them as best you can. And try to decide is this someone you would like to spend time with further? When we meet someone new we start a connection! Keep that going! Let the relationship grow or not grow out of connection. When you have sex you break the connection. He’s ready to go on to the next conquest. You must break that cycle or you’re doomed to repeat it.
Don’t be too needy – Men have a nose for that kind of thing. A woman who’s doing her own thing and has her own life is very attractive to a man. I heard a handsome celebrity man say in an interview that he saw two attractive women in the airport. The first one he said, “she was trying too hard”. Maybe she was winking at him, smiling too hard, I don’t know but he wasn’t feeling it even though he thought she was pretty. The second one he said was the one who drew him in because she wasn’t even looking at him, she was doing her own thing. He was checking her out. Play it cool and let him come to you!! Let HIM be the man in every aspect, let him make the advances, let him pick you up, let him pay for dates .
Stop letting men move in with you – I learned from a pastor to Never commit to, or marry a man based on his potential. For example: “one day he’s going to be a great business man”. A man doesn’t have to be a rich man to be a good man that’s not what I’m saying. As a man he should be stable! Stable meaning, he should be working, have his own place and car. Until a man establishes himself first he is unable to give of himself to a woman. He has to establish who he is and what he does. Living together a man gets all the benefits of marriage and none of the responsibility!! That’s not a smart move for the woman.
Build Intimacy through: Honesty, transparency, communication, conversation, closeness, establishing a friendship. You build true intimacy by not having sex. Instead building a connection that will last a lifetime. Stop robbing your tomorrow for short term gratification, which is essentially lust not love, there’s a big difference. That’s what I want for every Christian woman out there, to experience true love. Someone who accepts you for who you are and loves you anyway.
Featured Married Couple: Actress Meagan Goode and husband. Universal Studio executive, and pastor Devon Franklin. They are our featured couple of the month because they have lived it and experienced true intimacy by NOT having sex before marriage. They’re both Christians and were just both at a place in their lives where they did not want to have sex again until they were married. Now they have a healthy happy relationship that God has blessed and formed a lasting bond. I’m so happy for them! I like that they’ve been so open about waiting for sex and their journey. It shows other women what God can do if you will do it his way! They also wrote a book called, “The Wait”. I was very inspired by their decision to write the book. Though I have not yet read it, I plan to but it has inspired me to write another book with my husband as well. So we have that to look forward to! Good luck Meagan and Devon to God be the glory!
Hope you guys are having an awesome summer! I am too! Getting a lot done. It’s possible to be blessed and still have challenges. Take heart that God is strengthening us in those difficult times, and we must press on! To God be the Glory Forever! You have a friend in California!
Planning your one of a kind wedding of a lifetime takes careful consideration to every detail. Understanding wedding costs now can help you with your wedding budget later. The average cost of a wedding in the United States is 26,000. The planning of a wedding is a collection of decisions. The decisions you will make will weigh heavily on the cost and outcome of your wedding so choose wisely. For instance you’ll need to decide If you will be planning your wedding or if you would like to hire a professional wedding planner. There are a number of options to make your day special on a smaller budget and we will explore those options later in the post. Let’s begin with the basics.
God Bless Lilian and Joseph Meyers my great grandparents whose descendants will celebrate their family reunion today.
Looking for the perfect way to spend time with a special someone this summer? It’s really about the company not about what you do. Sometimes the simple things are best and the most fun. With plenty of sunshine, longer days and warmer temps lend itself to outdoor activities and more sociability. Make the most of summer by getting out and having fun!
The 2017 summer season is so exciting! From fit to flare, to casual wear, to evening, daytime, beautiful dresses & skirts perfect for the stylishly feminine modest woman. The best looks, trends, and shopping picks for summer style.
SCW’s spring and summer preview has it all for you! Color trends, from professional wear to casual wear, makeup and hair. Spring is almost here! And it’s never looked so good! This seasons fashions are bold, feminine, and fun. Runaways have been buzzing with excitement from New York to Milan.
Hello Ladies! For a romantic and memorable Valentine’s Day 2017, Love is in the air! Although you can’t put a price on love it’s important to be mindful of your budget. So whether you’re trying to splurge, or keep it moderate, there’s a gift out there your special someone will love. I think the key with Valentine’s day gifts are to put a lot of thought into it. Certainly a woman is impressed when she knows her man put a lot of thought and effort in planning something special for her.
For example: My husband and I had discussed our Valentine’s day date night plans ahead of time. So I was looking forward to that. But then he threw me a curve ball and said I’m getting my gift tonight, be dressed and ready! So I was like wow I didn’t know he had anything else planned, he surprised me! And I love that, now I can’t wait to see what it is. I also have some secrets of my own for him so it should prove to be a very interesting Valentine’s day to say the least. For men, I think the key with VDay gifts is to not only be thoughtful but to give him a gift that is useful! And there are some really nice couples gifts that are fun and romantic!
This New year’s eve you want to sparkle, shimmer and shine! For the biggest party of the year and the biggest date night, you want to look your best! This season it’s all about textures! Metallics and sequins are trending. Black is a popular color for New Years eve dresses, however you can mix it up and stand out with color. From long gowns to cocktail dresses this is your most exciting dress of the year.
Celebrating the beauty of winter! The frigid temperatures can wreak havoc on your skin. These simple winter skin care tips will show you how to protect your skin, while you enjoy the season.
Protect your skin from the cold weather. Bundle up. Cover your head, neck, and hands.
It’s a frenzied season with many expectations and obligations. Presents have to be purchased, baking has to be done, guests are coming, relatives have to be visited. In a season where you should experience peace and joy you could miss it all in the midst of the excitement. Here are some tips to manage stress this Christmas season while enjoying time with families and friends.
Looking good while dressing warm that’s the ticket. Your first line of defense in cold weather is a stylish yet warm coat. From wool to fleece the three quarter coat is what’s on trend this season. A stylish coat, great boots, warm sweater skinny pant, or jeans grab your stylish bag and head out to brave the colder temperatures while looking hot!
Decorating your home for the Christmas holiday and creating a warm and inviting atmosphere doesn’t have to blow the budget. You just have to shop smart. Save money on all your Christmas decorations with these money-saving tips.
Smart Tip of the day: Be creative and shop around for the best deals!
It’s cold! But you still want to look hot for your date. Below freezing temperatures dictate wearing layers to insulate warmth. It’s cozy sweater weather! And you can be stylishly warm. Millennials like to be casually stylish. Whatever your plans for date night you’ll be ready with SCW’s winter date night outfit picks.