Fit Moms equals Hot Mammas

We love and celebrate Moms here at Smart Christian Woman, and want them all to be happy, healthy, fit moms to live as long as possible for their families.  Every Woman needs to exercise to maintain her health and fitness most especially moms.  You have the whole family pulling on you.  The kids are in constant demand of your time attention and efforts.  You cope with doctors appointments, school appointments, children’s sports, birthday parties, running after the little ones, being stressed out and having to straighten out the older ones.

Then there are the needs of your husband, and the demands of running a household.  Sheesh, I’m tired already.  There has to be an outlet of relief for you.  If a hot water tank has a relief valve, then how much more does a mom need a relief?  That valve is put in place to relieve the pressure of the water tank so that it doesn’t explode.  I know its hard , who has the time, but we are going to throw out our excuse book today and get fit.

In my quest to get fit this summer, so far I’ve lost 4 1/2 pounds and I feel great!  My man says he likes what he sees and that’s all the motivation I need!  Granted some of us have more weight to lose than others but this is not about being thin, its about being healthy and making sure you maintain a good weight in accordance with your body type and shape.  The more excess weight you have the more your heart has to work and if it is overworked the result will be a heart attack.

You have a family, you have too much to loose.  I thought Maria Kang above was a great example of a fit mom with kids!  You know those little cutie pies have her running all around the house, probably just going to the bathroom seems like a vacation.  Yet she still makes time whether it’s during their nap time, or at night at their bedtime, she’s making the effort.

No ones asking you to be a fitness guru.  Start small, and build up.  Remember success comes from a series of small efforts done everyday.  If you’re a new mom getting in shape will help you to regain your sense of control over your body and your life.  For experienced moms exercise can provide an outlet from ongoing pressures of parenthood, and becomes your normal, something you do for yourself.  Exercise is linked to cancer, and diabetes prevention, improved mood and increased energy.  Here are a few tips to help you get started!

1. Start small, work your way up, and switch it up. For instance you may start out by walking, once you build your endurance you might try jogging.  You don’t have to follow a set program unless you want to.  I don’t.  What I mean by that is I started out walking around my neighborhood. Sometimes I would swim,  even though I had a full gym at home. (never used it) I probably shouldn’t tell you that but its true.  Then I thought I needed to step it up so I started using the elliptical machine, it was hard starting out but I’m off and running now.  I started with 5 to 10 min then I worked my way up to 25 min to half hour.  Some days I’d swim and do the machine.  Some days I don’t use the machine at all, I do leg lifts in my bed room.  I like them because it hits my target areas hips thighs, legs, and butt.  So switching it up a bit will help to not make exercising so rigid, instead do what works for you.  By all means get moving doing something.
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2. Take the kids with you, use them as weights to lift and tighten your arms if they are small if they are 5 and above they can keep you company.
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3. Find a fitness buddy who is also a mom and has the same struggles as you.  Make it a play date, in this case play date/exercise date.  She can come over to your house or you can take the kids and go to hers.  Plus that will be a way for you to have conversation with another adult.
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4. Set goals.  For instance in 3 months I’d like to loose 20 pounds.
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5. Keep it fun – use music
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6. If you feel that you’re too far gone and can afford it get a personal trainer.
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7. It’s not over when you loose the weight, its just beginning and now you must make this a lifestyle, your new normal unless you want to keep going round and round the mountain of loose weight gain weight, loose weight, gain even more weight. One day at a time.
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8. Do not forget your diet because it is in conjunction with your exercise that will bring you the most results.  For instance, I used to think that I needed a 3 course meal in order to feel full.  Now my diet goes something like this.  I used to have pancakes, eggs, and bacon, for breakfast.  Now I do cereal, fruit, yogurt and juice.  Lunchtime I used to do fast food i.e. burger, fries, etc.. Now most days for lunch I have a large chicken Cesar salad, and a sensible dinner.  Last night for dinner I made baked chicken, fresh corn, and rice with gravy for my husband and my son.

I had the baked chicken the corn and made myself a side salad. After eating like this months now my stomach has caught on and it has shrunk.  My man wanted to treat me to breakfast out.  I ordered a 2+2+2. (2 pancakes, 2 eggs, 2 sausage)  I thought this is the weekend he’s taking me out for breakfast splurge a little.  I realized my stomach had shrunk.  I’ve never been unable to finish pancakes.  Victory!!!

We have 3 great moms who are taking the fitness challenge.

1. Ann Hegan 33 in Montreal canada son Elliott 5 months old.She says during her pregnancy she did not exercise and made bad food choices to her horror she had gained 66 pounds. Today she works out on an elliptical trainer and does pilates and has lost 21 pounds!

2. susan Motte age 40 in Seattle Washington 2 sons Zach 8 and Gabe 5. After her children were born she was consistently 10 to 15 overweight and didn’t feel good. she did a 5k run, next she did a10k run and six months later was able to run half a marathon at 13.1 miles. Now running is a part of her life.

3Kira dickson age 28 Baltimore Maryland son tyler 11 months. kira is a high school  soccer and lacrosse coach. A committed athlete Kira was eager to workout quickly after giving birth and started doing stroller walks with the baby to the park . tyler enjoys the fresh air and Kira enjoys the fellowship with other moms in the park. start where you are.

“This post dedicated in Loving Memory to my Special Mom Pamela Newman, 1956-2005, August 31, Happy Birthday Mom,  My Angel!”

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Christian Singles Retreats

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sail the open seas on a Christian Singles Cruise. Online is NOT the only way to meet somebody.  Here’s a new concept get out into the real world, BE SEEN, mingle, network and connect in person.

Men are HUNTERS, they hunt outdoors (wow who knew).  No man is going to fall through the roof of your living room and say “Hey wanna go to dinner?”

Even if you don’t meet anyone (which is unlikely) you won’t be sitting on the sidelines of life (wishing, hoping, and dreaming) those things will not bring you closer to what you want.

You have to do your part. Pray, prepare yourself to be found, because he’s looking for you too.

http://www.christiansinglesonly.com

http://www.allchristiancruises.com

Christian Cruises 2015 Lines and ships http://www.shipcruise.org

 

 

Get out there and have fun !!!!

 

Overcoming Social Anxiety Disorder

 

Social Anxiety Disorder also known as “Social Phobia” is an anxiety disorder characterized by intense fear in one or more social situations causing considerable distress and impairs ability to function in at least some parts of daily life.  These fears can be triggered by perceived or actual scrutiny from others.  It is the most common psychiatric disorder 12% of American Adults suffer with.

Feelings of not being accepted or liked, unsure of what to say how to act or react to other people loss of confidence, and self control a virtual prison of fear. The truth is there are some people who are simply not worth our time because they are negative.  However, you are also missing out on the good people that come into your life to bless you.

Ironically  Social Anxiety Disorder spells S.A.D..  Learning to relax in social situations is the key.  Once you feel calmer socially, then thoughts like: “what do I say next?” disappear.  You learn to go with the flow and allow conversation to take its own natural path, without feeling you have to force it.  And that horrible feeling of “all eyes on me” suddenly fades as it starts to feel much less important if others are focusing on you or not.

These 7 social confidence tips will help you feel more relaxed when out with others and allow you to begin your journey from social phobic to the confident person you can really be.  Joel 3:10, “Let the weak say I’am Strong.”

1. Prepare to relax – The same way you program yourself to worry, you can begin to reverse this by deprogramming yourself.  Take the time to think about the upcoming  gathering while you are perhaps taking a soak in the tub while your mind and body are in a relaxed state.  Picture yourself in that situation  looking relaxed and confident.  Picture yourself enjoying those around you and the event ending well for you.
   

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2. Seek out social situations – Why you ask?  Because the more you avoid something the more we delay our growth.  Face your fear head on remember fear stands for: False Evidence Appearing Real.
   

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3. Focus on your surroundings.  A social phobic person focuses inwardly.  Start to focus outwardly to lower anxiety.  Make mental notes of the color of the walls any pictures on the wall. Nature is full of beauty.  Focusing outward will take your mind off of your phobia.
   

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4. Ask Questions – Focus on other people, it takes your attention from inward to outward, as a by product this strategy will help you to make friends you make others feel valued when you focus on them.
   

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5. Turn off your imagination –  Just before the event focus on things that make you feel good.
   

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6. Focus on your breathing, take deep breaths when needed.
   

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7. Repetition – Repeat the things on this list until  you no longer feel anxiety. Be confident, even if you do not “feel confident”.  Act Confident.  Act as if Luke 12:25, “Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life.”  1 Timothy 6:6,  “Godliness with contentment is great gain.”
   
   
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Overcoming Depression

Depression is a state of low mood and aversion to activity that can affect a persons thoughts, behavior, feelings and sense of well being.  People in a depressed state can feel, sad, anxious, empty, hopelessness, worthlessness, guilty, irritable, ashamed and or restless.

They may loose interest in activities that were once pleasurable. They may experience of loss appetite, or overeating, problems concentrating,  remembering details or making decisions, and may contemplate suicide, insomnia, excessive sleeping, fatigue, aches, pains and digestive complications.

Let’s go to the source and see what the Bible says about depression.  Psalms 147:3,  “God heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds and sorrows.”

Discouragement and depression are normal parts of being human. They can be triggered by traumatic events such as death of a loved one, illness, loss of job, status or divorce, leaving home. The Bible doesn’t show God punishing people for their sadness, rather acts of a loving father.

Self- Help and Coping Tips to Overcome Depression

Recovery from depression requires action, but taking action when your depressed is hard.  It’s the Catch 22 of depression recovery.  The things that help the most are the most difficult to do.

Time for some tough love, hence the man at the pool of Bethesda, John 5:3, “In these lay a great multitude of sick people, blind, lame, paralyzed, waiting for the moving of the water. For an Angel went down at a certain time into the pool and stirred up the water, whoever stepped in first, after the stirring of water, was made well of whatever disease he had.  Now a certain man was there who had an infirmity thirty – eight years.  When Jesus saw him laying there, and knew already he had been in that condition a long time, He said to him, “Do you want to be made well?” The sick man answered, Sir, I have no one to put me into the pool. When the water is stirred up, but while I am coming another steps in front of me.”  Get out violins!  In 38 years he could have crawled into the pool! or rolled yourself over into the pool.

Notice the scripture said Jesus already “knew” his condition he could have saved him at any time.  A lot of times God wants to see what we will do for ourselves!  Notice Jesus didn’t say you poor man and take pity on him.  Instead Jesus answered him and said John 5:8 “Rise up, take up your bed and walk.” Immediately the man was made well, took up his bed and walked.” I’m saying to you today GET UP!!

 

10 Tips to Combat  Depression

1. Start small and stay focused.  The key to depression recovery is to start with a few small goals and slowly build from there.  Draw from whatever resources you have.  You may not have much energy, but you probably have enough to take a short walk around the block to get some fresh air into your lungs and wake up your spirit.  Take things one day at a time.
   

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2. Turn to family members or friends who make you feel loved and cared for.  Spend time talking and listening face to face with trusted people and share what you are going through.
   

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3. Try to keep up with social activities even if you don’t feel like it.  When your depressed it’s more comfortable to just retreat in your shell.  But being around other people will make you feel less depressed, and who knows they may even make you smile.
   

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4. Join a support group for depression being around others who are dealing with depression can go a long way in reducing your sense of isolation.
   

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5. Get your mind off yourself!  Sometimes you have to get yourself off your mind and do something for someone else.  Maybe volunteering at a children’s hospital.  You will feel grateful being around these children and see that their situations are a lot worse than yours.  You don’t have to “feel like it” to do it.  I guarantee it will bring your spirit up!
   

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6. Exercise – a 10 minute walk can improve your mood for 2 hours.  The key to sustaining mood benefits is to exercise regularly.
   

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7. Learn how to change your diet.  Food is directly related to our moods, it will improve your mood and eliminate symptoms of depression.
   

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8. Work on eliminating negative thinking, it’s vital to breaking out of depression and other emotional ruts.  Become aware of dwelling on negative thoughts both real or imagined and stop them, it takes work and persistence.  Whether it’s the jerk that cut you off in traffic, or something a little closer to home.  Don’t give yourself the luxury of a negative thought.
   

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9. Set goals – something magical happens when pen meets paper and we write down our goals.  Our brain chemistry changes, neurons fire, hormones are deployed and we start thinking about how we can achieve those goals.  Where the mind goes the body follows.  Get busy!
   

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10. Reading and journaling – take a temporary leave from reality and bury yourself in one of your favorite books.  Start a journal.  Journaling helps us to mirror our lives, and when we can see ourselves clearly we can change anything.
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Overcoming Addictions and Bad Habits

Do you or someone you love need help in overcoming an addiction?

What is an addiction?

An addiction is when a person becomes powerless to stop a destructive behavior, causing their life to be unmanageable.

Some people consider addictions and bad habits as something that can be conquered by willpower alone.  But many people become so dependent on a behavior or substance that they no longer see how to abstain from it.

They loose perspective and a sense of priorities in their lives.  If you’re not happy with your life, change it.  Change is hard.  It is often times a positive.  Change is kicking down your door today!  The word addiction often brings to mind drugs.  There are any number of things that can become addictions.  Let’s look at some.

1.  Internet and Social Media Addiction

  

2. Shopping

3. Gambling

4. Alcohol

5. Smoking cigarettes

6. Pills

7. Hard drugs

8. Binge Eating/Snacking

  

9.  Addicted to a man

10. Coffee/ Caffeine

  Does the fact that I have addictions and bad habits make me a bad person?

It makes you human.  Humans in life are presented with challenges, and things they need to overcome, that’s life.  However, isn’t it good to know that Philippians 4:13 says,  “I can do all things through Christ.”  One practical tip that I can give you is to feed what you want to grow and starve what you want to DIE.  It’s something you are going to have to do constantly Corinthians 15:31, says  “I die to self daily.”

Habits defined – A habit is an acquired behavior or thought pattern that you have repeated so many times that it has become unconscious.  Habits can be helpful or harmful.

• Lateness
• Thinking negatively
• Gossiping
• Seeking attention
• Resisting change
• Procrastination
• Self sabotage
• Rash decisions

Psychologists say  that the reason bad habits are hard to break is because we need to repeat what’s familiar even if it’s bad for us.

Let’s Move forward!          

1. Admit that you have a problem. Be honest with yourself. You can’t conquer what you won’t confront.

2. Believe the power Of God can restore you to complete spiritual health.

3. Replace negative behaviors with positive ones

4. Drugs and alcohol are bodily addictions and  often need professional treatments to break them, such as meth, heroin, cocaine, pills, needles.  A treatment Center may be needed.

5. Develop self discipline and self awareness . Work on self mastery.

6. Create a plan – What is your plan of action?  If you stick to it that determines how bad you want it. Not ready yet?  Come back when your serious.

7. Put obstacles in place – For example if one of your habits is to check twitter when you should be working.  You can disconnect from the internet via phone by using software applications such as Freedom and Anti-social to block your access.

8. Involve others – Consider asking others such as family members, and friends to help out.  Tell them your goals. Tell them you need their support.  Remember they can’t do it for you.  You have to want it.  If you want it bad enough, you can MOVE Mountains!

9. Renew your mind.  Throw out old attitudes, and old ways of thinking. God wants to do a new thing in your life! Go to your Bible and look up addictions and see what scriptures you can meditate on.

10. Reward yourself – How you reward yourself is up to you. ( long as its positive) When you make progress give yourself positive reinforcement.

How do I become a Christian?

 

 

How do you become a Christian and Live a Victorious Life?

10 Steps to Living a Victorious Life

1. First, Luke 10:27, says “You should Love the Lord your God with your whole heart, mind, body and soul.”  Hebrews 11:6,  “Without faith it is impossible to please God.  He who comes to God must first believe that He is!”  Romans 1o:19,  “If you declare with your mouth Jesus is Lord.  And believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead You will be saved!”
   

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2. Acknowledge that you have sinned against God and that you have faults.  Romans 3:23 Says  “ALL have sinned and have fallen short of the glory of God.”  Notice it didn’t say some .  It said All.  So you might as well come clean .  You can fool people, but you can not fool God.  He knows your heart.  This is what it means to REPENT.  Repent, Pray, and Change your thinking, and any attitudes that do not please Him.
   

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3. You have confessed with your mouth that Jesus is Lord, believed in your heart, repented and prayed.  Now comes the hard part.  You have to walk the walk.  This walk is called the faith walk.  Believers “walk by faith not by sight.”  That means that you are not going to always be able to see your way clear in situations and figure everything out.  You are going to have to trust God in his infinite wisdom to work things out for your good.  Even your worst situations where you can’t see how anything good can come from it.  Genesis 50:20,  “You meant evil against me. God meant it for good!”  I’ve seen Him turn things around in my own life many times, it’s one of the things that makes me love Him so.  Hold On to God ‘s unchanging hand!  Always remember Romans 8:31,  “If God be for you he’s more than the whole  world against you.”
   

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4. Living a Christian life is not like going in to the hospital for an operation and a couple days, a week later your done and back home.  No it’s not that easy it’s an outpatient deal where the chief surgeon works on you constantly.  It is a lifestyle!  A lifestyle that leads to eternity.  Where will your soul live eternally?
   

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5. Christian Living is a Lifestyle of walking and living in the spirit.  What does it mean to walk in the spirit?  Galatians 5:16 says, “Walk in the spirit so you won’t fulfill the lusts of the flesh.”  What are the lusts of this world?  1. Lust of the flesh.  2. Lust of the eye. (craving what you see)  3. The boastful pride of life.  The world offers only craving for physical pleasure and everything you see, pride in possessions and achievements.  1 John 2:17,  “For the world is passing away and all of its lusts, but the one who does the will of God will live forever.”  To walk in the spirit you must know the fruits of the spirit, which are, Love, Joy, Peace, Forbearance, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness and self control.
   

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6. Don’t be too hard on yourself when you fail.  Admit it, pick yourself up, and trust God to move you forward.  Your God is a progressive God, He’s always looking forward never back.  You are never going to arrive at perfection.  Human beings are not perfect, however God works on those imperfections and we are made perfect through Him.  As Paul said “Not that I am perfect, but this one thing I do, forgetting what lies behind and pressing on to those things which are ahead!”  Strive to do the right things everyday, and over time progress will be made.  This lifestyle will become a part of you when you’re not even thinking about.  I’m living a Christian lifestyle, it will be your new normal.
   

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7. Read, study, do what your Bible says, and pray.   There are dreamers and there are doers.  Like Nike, (Just Do It!).  Meditate on the type of future you wish to have, the types of people you want to connect with, and the bad habits you wish to change .  This book of the law shall not depart from you.  Thou shall meditate on it day and night.
   

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8. Allow God to change you.  Because even with all of this you do not have the power to change yourself.  IT IS GOD WHO CHANGES US!  Only God has the power to change us!  John 15:5,  “He is the Vine, we are the branches if we remain in him.  If you abide in Me and I in you, you will bear much fruit. But Apart from Me YE CAN DO NOTHING!”
   

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9. Openly share the Good News of the Gospel of Jesus Christ as I’m doing with you.
   

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10. Pray for others and care for them if it is in your power to do so.  Pray for your enemies.  Love one another as Christ loves you.  Fellowship with other believers.

 

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Affirmation

Stress Free Summer Travel tips

  

1. Do Not post on Facebook that you will be away on vacation. This should be a no-brainer, but it astonishes me how many people do this.

2. Plan itineraries and accommodations well in advance. Book your tickets ASAP.  If you book last minute you loose options.  The key to getting the best deal is flexibility in your travel dates.

3. Airports  are busy crowed places.  Do not leave your luggage unattended even for a minute.  That’s all it takes is a minute for your luggage to disappear.

4. Leave  travel information with a family member or neighbor.  Such as flight number, hotel, return flight information.

5. Beware of thieves in other countries looking to prey on American tourist.  Try not to look like a tourist. Floppy hat, check. “I love location” tee shirt, check.  Camera around the neck, check.  Standing on street corner looking  at the map, etc…

6. Be on time.  Avoid late check in.  When you check in late or more to the point check your bags in late, it’s a strong possibility that your bags will not arrive with you.  (been there) Your bags may not arrive until a day or two later.

7. Pack light or at least efficiently.  This is a hard one for women myself included.  The reason is that it will cost you at the airport.  Overweight bags run about 80 dollars a bag.  I’ve paid many times.

8. Make sure your passport is valid and does not need to be renewed.  Last thing you want to do is try an renew your passport while on vacation.

   

 

  Relax it’s Summer!

 

The Armor of God

God is good, but we are living in evil times.

Deceitful wicked people with evil plans in their heart.  War, pain, and death abound.  The bible warns us of this in Matthew 24:11 “Many false prophets will arise and will mislead many.  Because of the increase in wickedness, the lawlessness of man is increased and the love of many will grow cold.” God says in John 16:33,  “Cheer up, I have overcome the world. I have spoken these things to you that you may have peace in me.  In this life you will have tribulation.”  The rain falls on the just and the unjust alike.

It is a wonderful thing to know that when you go through difficult times in life He will be with us.  Be strong and courageous.  Do not be afraid or terrified because of them for the Lord your God is with you and will not leave nor forsake you.  Ephesians 6:12, says  “We wrestle not against flesh and blood but against principalities and power against the rulers of darkness of this world.”  God has covered all bases.  He tells us how to fight back against the enemy.  It’s called the Armor of God.  You have to get suited up like a soldier going to battle.

 

1. The Helmet of salvation -protect your mind   
   

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2. The Breastplate of righteousness The righteous will inherit the kingdom of God
   

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3. The Sword of the spirit– which is the Word of GOD found in your bible 
   

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4. The Shield of faith stand firm in faith
   
   

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5. The Belt of truth– The truth shall set you free   
   

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6. Shoes of peace– Bible says blessed are the peacemakers
   

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Maintaining Respect in Relationships

How to maintain dignity and power while handling difficult relationships.

Difficult relationships are some of the most stressful situations we can find ourselves in.  Have you been in a  relationship that made you break all your rules only to be left feeling disappointed and defeated? Have you had a situation where you’ve said, “I never tried this before I meant him”?

When we throw out the rule book so to speak, what we’re really saying is the code which I live by is not important. This person is more important than my own code of ethics.  It’s all about having personal standards.  People respect other people who have standards and boundaries.  It’s the old saying if you don’t stand for something you’ll fall for anything.  I heard about a “first date” story the other day which prompted this post.

First of all, the man should plan the date.  Guy takes young lady to a nice restaurant, they have great food and pleasant conversation.  Next he tells her that the next place he’s going to take her will be a “surprise”.  So things have been going well and she trusts him.  (sometimes people will bait us in only to have the rug pulled out).  The date took place here in California.  He took her to a “Secret Sex Club” in Hollywood.  You have to know somebody that knows somebody to get in and pay 120 dollars per person . Once you are in anything goes!

She was floored.  She had never been to anything like this before.  From the outside it looks and sounds like a regular club, pulsating loud music you can hear from the street.  She said it was like she had just walked in to Sodom and Gomorrah.  There were drag queens everywhere, women having sex with women, men having sex with men, open drug use.  The waiter was a gay midget that swings from the ceiling to your table to take your drink order.  All this with the loud heavy metal music that would break glass, and couples on the prowl.

He told her it’s insulting to have your clothes on and that they should both get naked.  She told him that I’m not having sex with strangers and I’m not having sex with you.  She left the club without him and got a cab home. (GOOD Girl)  They never saw each other again.  This young lady clearly has standards and was not willing to compromise.  In life you make your stand up front and people will either fall in line or fall out.

1.  An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. Choose wisely.
   

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2. Say goodbye.  There are some people who you are going to have to cut ties with in life plain and    simple!  This is a skill you are going to have to get good at.  It’s called “discernment” google it, study it in your Bible.  Spiritual discernment, for example is when you meet someone and to your eyes they look good, but your spirit tells you there’s something wrong with them.  You’ve done it before, a relationship goes south and you say to yourself, “Something TOLD me not to get involved with this person”.  That “something” was the holy spirit the discerner, the helping still small voice of wisdom inside you that warns you.Trouble is some people never quiet themselves long enough to hear what the spirit is saying.  That’s why your time with God is so important.  Prayer and meditation are essential.  I’m expert at saying goodbye.  I will give you a complementary gift and travel mug, and tell you don’t let the door hit you in the behind on your way out.  It’s not that I’m being mean.  It’s that I know who I am, I know where I’m going, and I’m not interested in anyone or anything that ‘s not in line with that.
   

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3. Avoid people you know are toxic. (no good for you)  If you’re constantly picking the bad boy well that’s what you are going to get, along with all his bad boy ways.  Disrespectful, cheating, lies,  dating your friends, family, and basically an “I don’t give a crap attitude about anyone but myself”.  Is this your idea of A GOOD MAN?  If it is then you might consider counseling.
   

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4. Surround yourself with positive people.  You’re only as good as the resources you draw from.
   

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5. Establish boundaries with the men you date.  Make it clear to him who he is dealing with.  You must know who you are.
   

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A Life of New Beginnings

What a wonderful concept that we can have a new life in Christ. We don’t have to be bound to our old life, old habits, or our old ways of  thinking. You owe God every ounce of energy you have to now walk in the newness of life that he has blessed you with.  For example maybe God has delivered you out the drug scene, because yes Christians fall into traps too. We are real people. There are any number of traps that God can deliver us out of such as, bad attitudes, abusiveness, alcoholism, waywardness.  Start a journal called my new normal and document the things you intend to do differently. The Bible says to write the vision and make it plain, Habakkuk 2:2.

Embrace the fact that you are now in a new chapter of your life.  Embrace the new you and establish a new normal.  For example normally you would hang with a certain crowd.  But now in your new normal you will have to establish new friends and cultivate new relationships that are in line with your new life. Birds of a feather flock together. Life has rhythm.  Success has a rhythm.  Positive people have a rhythm. You have to get into that new rhythm .

Touch and agree with the right people.  The Bible says how can two walk together less they be agreed. Do not waste your time with people who do not share your rhythm.  Are you a pigeon or an eagle?  Eagles fly at higher altitudes that other birds cannot survive in.  When you are in your rightful place no one will be able to compete with you.

How to be a Respectable Woman

A Smart Christian Woman is a high quality Woman of value. She values herself and others, she’s considerate. Her priorities are in order she loves and values God most of all, which springs forth a correct way of living. She knows she’s an imperfect being made perfect through His perfection.  A classy woman is a woman with a high sense of self worth and projects herself in that way.  A high self worth comes from knowing God and knowing that you are worthy.

A woman of low value has such a low sense of self worth and no self esteem. It’s impossible for her to perceive what life is like from another angle.  She’s too into herself!  A case of the empty vessel makes the most noise.  The root of the problem with low self esteem is your thinking.  Proverbs 23:7  “As a man thinks in his heart so is he”.  Romans 12:2  “Be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind”.  Now let’s dive into this!

1. Start by thinking and acting as a high Quality Woman and marketing yourself as such.  I used  the business term (marketing) because you are in the business of life and you are marketing yourself.  There is a message you project to the world.  Always present yourself well.  Many women of all ages simply let themselves go.  In other words they start to value themselves much less.  Letting your appearance go can be a tell tale sign that you feel bad about yourself.
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2. What is classy is special.  Classy is not found on every street corner.  A classy woman has to be found and cultivated.  That’s the reason high class women are rare and sought after.  Build confidence by reading positive affirmations and reading your Bible.  Check out my positive affirmations category right here on SCW.  Meditate on a scripture that makes you feel good.  You may want to put up positive affirmations around your house, on the frig, whatever works for you.  Constantly remind yourself, you’re significant, God loves you, and you can live your best life.
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3. Lead by example.  People may not believe what you say, but they will always believe what you do.
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4. Keep your property in good shape.  Our neighbors can tell a lot about us by how we keep our property.  Keep your home and surroundings well kept.  Keep your car clean as well as your school and work materials organized.  People will see that you put time and effort into your belongings.
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5. Be a cultured person.  Notice the events happening around you as well as events happening around the world. Whether it’s movies, entertainment, politics, or current trending issues.  The more you know the more well rounded you become which makes you a great conversationalist, able to converse on a variety of topics.
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6. Keep your language clean and respectable.  Ephesians 4;29,  “Let no filthy language or corrupt communication come from your mouths”.  Let everything you say be good and helpful so that your words will be an encouragement to those that hear them.
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7. Exude confidence!  Many people will try to test you.  No matter what they say, if you have confidence in yourself and your worth, their disrespectful behavior will go away because they realize that they cannot intimidate you.  (you are above anything petty.)  My motto is love me or hate me I’m still going to shine.
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8. Stick to your boundaries clearly communicate what you are willing to accept and what the consequences are for  the trespassing of those boundaries.
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9. Stick up for yourself when you need to.  If you want to respect yourself than you can’t be too nice to people.  So I think rather than striving to be nice, strive to be respected.  No matter how nice you are there are going to be some people that don’t like you anyway.   So don’t be a people-pleaser.  Instead please God.  He’ll take care of the rest.
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10. Avoid apologizing all the time and learn to say no.  You can’t please all of the people all of of the time.  There’s one of you.  Take care of yourself first.
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11. Give everyone a chance.  Everyone is innocent until proven guilty.  It won’t take long at all and people will reveal their true character.
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12. A high class woman rarely loses her cool.  We all have our moments, that’s life.  This is about a confident mindset that allows you to handle whatever comes your way.
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13. A high class woman has good posture.  Posture is important because it affects how others perceive you but more importantly it affects your spirit.  If you are standing up nice and tall and speaking in a clear commanding voice this tells your body and the bodies around you that you’re confident.  If you are slumped over, dragging you tell your body and those around you you are lacking self confidence which then is projecting your attitude. Hold your head up high, sit up straight, speak clearly carry yourself in a way that commands respect.
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14. Excel at something.  Whatever it is that you do well do it to the best of your ability.  Whether it be your career, school, sports, or maybe a great Mom and Homemaker.

Being a respectable woman is not an attitude of I’m better than you.  James 4:6 says,  “God resists the proud but gives grace to the humble”.  We are to love ourselves in a balanced way.  Being a respectable woman means knowing who you are in Christ.

 

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